on a brighter note, my hair is pink

-xokitty

 I keep having this crazy fantasy of running away. leave everything behind. start new. I would go to california. I love california. I have cousins there. I love my cousins so much. I can just imagine it. Renting a room at my cousin's home. I'm sure she would let me. new job. new friends? love? who knows. new me. away from this. the sadness. the emptiness. california makes me happy. there's the aching in my heart and the vomit in my throat. it takes over my mind and my body and I can't take it anymore. I want to run. I want to leave. I'm scared. It scares me. but it's just a fantasy. nothing more. 

-xokitty

 How can you love someone so much and still know they're not right for you? 

How can you know someone isn't right for you and still continue to stay?

How can you continue to stay when it makes you so unhappy?

How can you be so unhappy when you love someone so much?

-xo kitty

 hey people.... sorry I went a little MIA there 0-0 one thing y'all should know is I'm a notorious ghoster but I almost always come back ;p

in fact I could tell you about this years long friendship I had with this kid on kik (if you know you know) I would delete the app and lose contact for months or sometimes year and then reconnect but anyways that's its own story for another post so lmk if y'all wanna hear it!!

(we are no longer friends)

-xokitty

so loves I read another book! The Love Hypothesis by Ali Hazelwood -- in a single day 0-0 so clearly I enjoyed it lol but anyways super good book and I would highly recommend!! It’s of course a romance novel, as far as spice level goes it’s got just slight spice I would give it about a 🌶️🌶️🌶️ rating level :) super cute book!!

One of my main reasons for reading this book next is because I heard a movie is coming out of it and I definitely wanted to read it before watching (which I in fact did backwards with It Ends With Us) anywaysss looking forward to the movie! Not sure I would have imagined Lili Reinhart to play Olivia but I’m not complaining :p

I am now currently reading Verity by Colleen Hoover!!

-xokitty

 also guys I just have to ask why is Kyle Gallner so goddamn hot. 

 okay guys so I finally finished reading "I'm Thinking of Ending It" by Iain Reid!

let me just say... wow. so many thoughts. so many emotions. not once did I know what was going to happen next. and the ending? honestly, at first, I wasn't loving the book and by the end I was so confused but then it just all clicked. the whole book is a metaphor for mental illness and disorders.

it's not for everyone but if you're looking for psychological thriller, I would recommend!

-xokitty

 im a john q lover girl now #dinnerinamerica

so punk rock

-xokitty

 ive been in such a reading slump lately it's so crazy guys :(

 ok guys I actually just watched dinner in america for the first time and holy moly. thats all I have to say.

-xokitty

 good morning my kitty queens, today is the first day in a while that I got to sleep in :3 yayayay anyways I'm getting my nails done today and getting my hair done next week I'm so so excited !!!

I hope all my kittens have a great great day today :>

 just remembering the time a creepy guy BEGGED to send me a D video and "rate it" like ok first of all you look desperate...sicko... ANYWAYSSS I told him to send me money and he sent me $50, then I blocked him. <3

girls, remember to live free and manipulate men who deserve it!!! 

-xokitty

 just some night updates for you kitties!!!

went to applebees w besties and had some dollaritas (but why were they 1.50 tho...) ANYWAYS they were delish nonetheless besides the fact that it tasted like straight sugar! Had fun w friends and even got dessert YUMMY

And im so so excited bc I booked an appt to get my hair done in 2 weeks!!! ^-^ I will be going PINKKKK :D of course with some black accents teehee -- can you tell thats my fav color combo or not yet??

okok queens I should go to bed now bc unfortunately your girl is a normal ass human with a job.. GOODNIGHT MY KITTIESSS MUAH

-xokitty 

​I found my signature scent recently. You know, it just came to me. For my birthday I had received one of those little beauty kits with various “vanilla products”

well one product in particular was roll on perfume from McoBeauty no.1. The second I smelled it I felt like I was in heaven. Black plum, vanilla and just a bit of musk. I love it sm!! By far my new favorite scent and I might just wear it till the day I die. Maybe I'm glazing but the store employee agreed with me sooo

I just wanted to share w you all!! If you guys find it and try it lmk!!! :3

-xokitty

​so admittedly I’m not too well versed in fashion… I’m slowly learning. I grew up a plus size girly so my fashion sense has very much been oversized clothing to “hide my fat” but I’m learning that I’m still gonna be fat anyways so why not embrace it ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

I’m very drawn to alt and y2k fashion! So little by little I’ve been trying to add more pieces to my wardrobe — mainly by thrifting !!

anyways I recently discovered Vinted and lemme just say — WAYYYY better than Depop. Don’t get me wrong I was a Depop girly for a bit but the prices were not it… the Vinted girlies know where it’s at FORREAL. So here’s a little peek at my recent purchases!! Styling tips always appreciated!! ^_^

-xokitty

​Hey guys so my blog was gone for a min… for some reason google decided to delete my email bc they “couldn’t verify it was my account” — even tho I added a recovery email AND phone number…

ANYWAYSSSS one appeal later and I’m BACK!! woohoo

Needless to say, I cannot be stopped :3 I have some content made up so cannot wait for you all to see!! <3

-xokitty

 it's so silly to thing that I woke up this morning with no intention of creating a blog and then I got inspired by a tiktok video (as one does) 

and now I'm here. lol.

enjoy my thoughts, goodnight, friends!!!

-xokitty

I think this year by far has been the most mentally challenging year and yet at the same time I feel like I am the most me I've ever been in a long time. 

funny how that works?

somehow, I'm alive

somehow, I'm functioning

somehow, I am managing. 

and how crazy is that?

-xokitty

 ​Why is it wrong to love sex? We are already so stigmatized being women as is. But a woman who loves sex? Might as well just say I’m a whore.

But what’s wrong with loving pleasure?? Whats wrong with loving the action of being so vulnerable and intimate with another human being??

Not everyone loves sex. But I am a woman and I also happen to love sex. Who cares? (˶˃ ᵕ ˂˶) .ᐟ.ᐟ

-xokitty

​(One of Those) Crazy Girls - Paramore 

This is a recent find of mine and it’s been on repeat since!! 

What song(s) have y’all had on repeat lately? 

-xokitty

 Hi hi this is my blog!!! I created this to have an anonymous and safe space to share my thoughts/feelings/whatever ^_^ I’ll share my stories so feel free to share your own <3 

This one is for all the thought daughters out there :*

-xokitty